"Why would you ask her? She's been divorced twice." When I heard that, I felt embarrassed and ashamed. Who would listen to me? I mean, what right do I have to give any advice. I've been married twice and my current marriage was hanging on by a thread.
I hung up with my caller and sat there wondering. Lord, years ago you gave me confirmation after confirmation that you would restore my marriage (to my second husband) but we got divorced. You said there was a ministry but I didn't see it. How am I to tell any body about marriage when all mine failed? What about the confirmations and words you gave us?
Time went on and I remarried, this time to my third husband, but eventually we too went our own ways. Yet, before this marriage ended, I did everything different. I had so many regrets from the previous marriage that I didn't want to repeat it again. This time I fought for my marriage. I went to marriage counseling on my own and sought God. I mean, I really stood on scriptures and prayed for my marriage. However, it eventually decimated. During the last two weeks in the house, I had this peace that I never felt before. During those two weeks, The Lord had me stand on scriptures against rejection. When the day came to move, I was OK mentally. I didn't have a breakdown like I did before. My marriage wasn't saved but my mind and heart were.
I learned through this that God can't force a person to do what you want. He would be going against that persons free will. But what I did learn was that God never left me. Actually, I learned a lot of things this last time around. God specifically says in scripture to be equally yoked. He didn't say that just to be mean, rather that we could be happy and have a prosperous marriage. That's not to say that God can't restore a marriage because he can do anything. I believe it takes three to change the situation. You, the other person and God.
When we marry a unbeliever, our chances of divorce increases. First of all, this person doesn't have a relationship with God and when hard times come, they are usually the one you have to hold up while trying to handle the current situation. That is why it is important to be equally yoked with your potential spouse. With two praying in agreement, you can overcome anything with God.
I am not saying that divorce is or was the right thing to do. I would never tell a person to get a divorce. But I will say this, just because you may be going through a divorce or been divorced, God still loves you. He can still use you for his glory. I love to say," God likes to show off."
My story now is this .Forgive, forgive, forgive! Despite what you been through or who has hurt you, forgive that other person so you won't delay your healing or blessings. Seek God first and do it his way. He laid down the ground work so we wouldn't have to go through the hurt or sadness. It takes a whole lot of time to deal and heal the pain and hurt. Instead, that time could of been used to minister to someone or do something for the kingdom of God.
Don't let your emotions get in the way of the truth. It's been a long journey but if I could encourage just one person with the truth, then it was worth it. Scripture says, " You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives".Genesis 50:20 New International Version