I remember growing up wondering, "Why did this happen? Where was my family to protect me? Why me? ". Then the ones I trusted, added an extra blow by betraying me. It felt as if no one was there to protect me and I began to believe the lies of the enemy. My heart and attitude turned from God and towards myself. Self healing. Self gain. Self satisfaction. Self gratification.
I knew God but I didn't know him. Still, despite my lifestyle and refusal to turn to Him, He still showed himself in subtle ways. I look back now and realize that no matter how far I tried to go, He still had his hand over my life.
Death tried to take me numerous of times but God didn't allow it. The enemy tried to take my mind but God didn't allow it. The enemy tried to take my health but God said, "No". God said "NO" to all the tricks and devices of the enemy against me.
Little did I know that each hurt, each trial, each failure, each fall, each tear, every pain was being caught and mixed together to create the beauty of today. Everything that I have endured has made me stronger and it is only by the grace of God.
All the while I was looking for something, He was ALWAYS there loving me, UNCONDITIONALLY. He was the one to stop death. He was the one who picked me up, He was the one loving me when I was rejected, hurt and betrayed. He was the one to heal me when I made a decision. He was the one to renew my mind when I could of lost it. He was the one who give me life when I tried to end it.
People who know me, who know my past sometimes wonder why I talk about Jesus so much and if it is just for show. Well, no it isn't. When someone gives you something that you don't deserve, that is love. When someone does something for you and doesn't ask for anything, that is love. When someone sacrifices for you when you don't deserve it, that is love. When someone gives up His life for you when you are at your lowest and dirtiest , that is love. That is why I talk and share Jesus.
And to the critics. No I am not perfect. I still have struggles but I am striving to live like Jesus because through my life, you will see Jesus.
So, I say to you. "If you're going through something. Hold on. Cry to God. Just give Him a chance. You will have a life that you've never known."...............JustFood4Thought